Events: Hell of Hunterdon 2023
(2023) The deep chair in the lobby of the Princeton Elks Lodge was selected post-ride because it’s what I imagined Mathieu van der Poel or Wout van Aert would sit in after winning another Spring Classic. I had just come off the Hell of Hunterdon short course, and the festivities were dozens of minutes away. Not too long ago, I was in that same chair preparing to step out onto the Hunterdon County, NJ, roads when I overheard refreshing conversation. Of course it would involve Tom Boonen’s famous policy on leg warmers.
The Kermesse Sport event Hell of Hunterdon is an established ride comprising 78 miles for the long course. Within those miles are twelve unpaved sectors totaling nearly twenty percent of the course. Throw in nearly 6,000 feet of climbing and it’s certainly a trying day out. Held this year in late March, the event has earned its badge as a classic, having taken place every year (Covid years excluded) since 2009. This year there were 450 registered riders, up 25% from last year, the first year since the Shutdown.
A participant since 2010, the Hell of Hunterdon is an automatic addition to the yearly calendar. Vacations? Check. Holidays? Check. Hell of Hunterdon? Absolutely. Without the Hell of Hunterdon, the cycling calendar never has its official start. The 2023 version had a different look for me, but the ride’s anthem is still as strong as ever.
There were moments where the Hell of Hunterdon looked like they weren’t going to happen for me. An injury nearly prevented me from making it to the start. That’s how ingrained this ride is- a goal to come back healthy and ride the Hell of Hunterdon. This is how I got onto the short course despite having registered for the long. The moment of rolling out, an experience nearly in jeopardy a month prior, was of great exhilaration.
Each of the three Hell of Hunterdon courses is beautiful. Kermesse Sport boxes the experiences perfectly. The main reason the short course was selected is its shared routes heading out and return. All three route starts are identical until just after the second unpaved sector on Stony Brook Road, fourteen miles in. Once the gravel was cleared, short course riders peeled off, pointing toward the link up with the final miles of the long course. The medium course riders would deviate from the route around 22 miles in. The medium course would rejoin the overall course with nearly thirty miles remaining on the day; the short course riders rejoined with a dozen miles still to go.
The day prior to the ride, cold rain lashed the area for hours. There was relief and concern. The relief was that the Hell of Hunterdon had not been scheduled for that day; concern because there was a high probability the sectors would be mush. Thanks to high winds early in the morning, the wet roadways were mostly dry. The gravel sectors were damp but fast. This wasn’t the cold ride of 2012, but there was concern the winds of 2015 were making a visit. Instead, the weather proved comfortable.
There are supremely anticipated experiences in the Hell of Hunterdon. One enjoyable aspect is the opening climb. In three short miles all three routes ascend nearly 300 feet using Hollow Road. The newly-resurfaced road meanders as much as neighboring Rock Brook. The stream looked healthy with cascading waterfalls and deep pools. Meanwhile its banks broke open the first signs of spring with vibrant daffodils and little purple flowers. Red buds on tree branches were elevating color skyward, mirroring the riders’ climbing to open the experience. Some late starting riders were picked up as I settled into the climb to Long Hill Road.
The route zigs and zags onto Montgomery Road and onto the first unpaved sector. Montgomery Road is a bit of a mystery. The road starts innocently enough at a quaint wooded hamlet. This portion is paved. Suddenly the road becomes unpaved, asking riders to navigate a bit of climbing. Soon after the uphill gravel, the sector becomes paved again and immediately plunges riders down more than three hundred feet of elevation in one mile. A few turns and the route heads back up the ridge to regain most of the mentioned elevation.
Sunny Brook Road’s unpaved section was fast and flat with a layer of paste from the previous day’s rain.
Another anticipated experience showed up as a surprise- Stony Brook Road, a beautiful sliver of roadway served as the connector for the short course. This road had everything. Stoney Brook Road features one of the more enjoyable unpaved sectors as it winds through a wooded forest. It also winds along the peaceful Stony Brook where not a single rider or car was to be seen. The road also passes the - now closed - bridge of Mine Road, a former wild ride for past Hell of Hunterdon participants.
The route back was more populated as riders from each distance started showing up along the route. Aunt Molly Road was as moody as always. This sector featured hidden potholes as well as deep ruts. It randomly featured large gravel before switching over to pavement. Riders were given the choice to cut the distance - and climbing - by turning onto Hopewell Rocky Hill Road, but I went for the climb up Hopewell Amwell Road. Secretly I hoped the train was operating this year for that little flourish to end the Hell of Hunterdon.
The flourish came in a gusty tailwind to escort me back to the Princeton Elks Lodge and the chair I imagined was reserved for me. Sure enough I had the choice of any parking spot on the bike rack at the Lodge. I walked in and plopped down where I imagined. Eventually I found my way to the reception hall where Athletic Brewing Company and Flying Fish Brewing Company provided the refreshments. While waiting for ridekicks Eric and Mike (yes, that Mike), I got to talk to some of the finishers who came and went from the table. One rider stated it was a beautiful course, hinting this was his first experience. He stated it was and expressed intrigue as to the other rides available on the calendar. Another finisher sat down to state it was his first post-Covid Hell of Hunterdon, having done each ride prior to 2020.
Finishers trickled into Princeton Elks Lodge and collected their finisher glass, water bottles, and goody bags. Lucky participants celebrated winning prizes such as Kermesse gear, Lazer helmets, a Giant shop pump, and one finisher got to take home a set of Shimano UItegra C36 road wheels. Eventually my ridekicks showed up and we wound tales like old times. That was the winning prize- sitting around after a great ride with old friends again. Eventually we went our separate ways but before we did, rides were thrown around. That’s the great thing about Kermesse: they have extra chances to try their events once you’ve found out you missed out. Perhaps I’ll request a deep cushy chair for each event to keep the health trending upward.
